Parties Over

This post is inspired by:

“Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans”. 

I’m home for a little bit, and at my favorite coffee shop this morning with a friend who’s moving, and leaving the state for good. What a sad day indeed. We’ve known each other for some time, years in fact — and have always said we’ve been friends, but in reality that’s not the case. Over the last few years, we’ve called each other up and gotten coffee, hung out every few months at a party, and have made countless plans to see each other that just kept getting pushed back. Que the John Lennon quote from above here.

While we were getting coffee this morning, our conversation switched over to this very topic. We couldn’t help but question our intentions with each other — why our plans kept falling through, and why we kept falling in and out of touch. He then looked me right in the eye and said the following: “If you really wanted to stay in touch, you would have”.  And of course this works both ways — if he really wanted to stay in touch, he would have, sadly he was just better at this than I; but still I knew he was right.

I didn’t know what to say. It was bad enough that I felt bad about not seeing him, and staying in touch more let alone having him admit it to me at 9:30 AM on a day where I’m home. Yes, it’s easy to fall in and out of touch, because that’s what happens. Everyone is busy. Most people want to call/text/email but don’t.

And just as fast as they appeared, they’re gone.

There’s One Person Ahead

This post is inspired by:

“Young and stupid, left wide open
Hearts are wasted, lives are broken
“.

Apparently now it’s 1999. Video games, fashion trends, and music are all hitting the clock back, back to, let’s say a simpler time. A time where everyone was wearing overalls, skateboarding became the coolest form of transportation, and everyone was listening to their latest music on an MP3 player. While I was only 7 at the time, I was very up to speed musically, which I will say gave me an advantage, and an edge in terms of my friends. Backstreet Boys was my first concert, but my first Blink 182 concert very shortly after that was my all time favorite. Therefore, to say I was overly ecstatic when they posted there return to the stage first in 2009, and again in 2016, is an understatement.

It should be clear by now how important music is to me, and I will proudly state that Blink 182 helped make that happen for me. When one listens to music, they are either more attracted to the beat of the song, or the lyrics. One without the other makes the song incomplete, yes, but the majority of the time, one stands out more than the other.

In terms of Blink 182 and their music, lyrics have always stood out to me, and the beat is just a bonus. After having been out of the music world for so long as a trio, I was more than eager to find, learn, and listen to the new Blink 182 in their new album California.

Que the old Blink 182 here. And now get ready to hear a new/different nostalgic version of the band. To help us get back into what Blink 182 is, the band threw out their first new single “Bored to Death”. Instantly, if you’re a fan, you are thrown back into it; starting off with a Blink 182 staple: a drum solo from drummer Travis Barker. Following the mini solo, other staples include a catchy chorus and similar guitar rifts, the album is a bit repetitive if you ask me.

Since it’s premiere, Blink 182 has come a long way since it’s first hit album Cheshire Cat and the mediocre songs that came with it, including but not limited to M&M’s. While yes, the band has a had a lot of ups and downs, starts and restarts, it’s hard to say if this comeback with be 100% successful. So far, so good.

  • If you are looking for an Enema of the State vibe, this album will not suffice those needs.

Please Don’t

This post is inspired by:

“Its alright, a bit scathed, a bit lost
I’ve been played, I ain’t that clever”

Well, I’m another year older. I celebrated my 24th birthday 8 days ago. I could go on and on about my birthday celebration, and the gifts I got, but for once, I’ll pass on that. I heard from family, close friends, not so close friends, exes, and people I haven’t heard from in 20 years. Birthdays are funny — they show who a true person is, no matter what the distance, age gap, or current relationship status, and that to me, is what marks the day special. Someone once told me that true feelings come out when one is at an airport, about to board a flight. And then followed that sentence with “that only happens one other day a year”. Birthday’s signify who cares, and who doesn’t. Who reaches out and who doesn’t.

______________

Earlier this month, I had a pleasure of reconnecting with someone with whom I’ve seen, or spoken to in years. And not the figurate term years, literal. As in 6 years. Since my junior  year of high school. When we saw each other, of course there was a lot to catch up on. College, full time job life, relationships (past and present), and all things current lifestyle. This meet up got me thinking to about one specific birthday I spent with him, and some other friends, but most importantly how easy it is to revert back to a younger version of yourself when given the opportunity.

I’ve come to find that when given the opportunity, yes, it’s very easy to revert back, but it’s what you do in that moment that matters. Do you fully revert back? For example, do I stay up until 5 AM, drink and smoke, and let myself fully let go — or do I appreciate the progress I’ve made since then, and take control of the situation?

While I’m still very young, I will say I’ve taken pride in a few important things in my life. One of these things that I’ve taken pride in is the ability to take control when I didn’t think it was possible — or in my favor. Speaking with my dad over my birthday, I was able to have a real, judgment free conversation, which to me, should be every child’s dream. To me, when that moment comes, is when you become an adult.

I’ve always been sentimental about my birthday, and if you truly know me, you know why. Yes, getting a year older is significant, but my background triumphs that. Yes, homemade cakes, and cheesecake are important, but conversations on that day become significant, and one that I never forget. So, on my 24th year, I commend those who reached out, forgive those who meant to, and erase those who didn’t.

Shown below is a message from a nurse who treated me 24-23 years ago. I haven’t seen her since. Proof that those who want to reach out, and wish you well, will do so.

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What Comes Next

This post is inspired by:

“Athletics lasts for such a short period of time. It ends for people. But while it lasts, it creates this make-believe world where normal rules don’t apply. We build this false atmosphere. When it’s over and the harsh reality sets in, that’s the real joke we play on people. . . . Everybody wants to experience that superlative moment, and being an athlete can give you that. It’s Camelot for them. But there’s even life after it.” 

Hi there! After a world-wind week, I sit here again, blogging. A new favorite activity of mine, along with working on my two online classes, and actually working. These past two weeks have been a little difficult for me as I got a terrible cold and missed work. While some people like sick days, I on the other hand, don’t even enjoy days off. Days off always (well, not always) get me into trouble someway or another. So, over the last few days, I laid low, which to me, involves lots of TV, and lots of tea.

Ever heard of the show Friday Night Lights? Of course you have! If you’re unfamiliar with the show itself, take a second to view this clip. The show follows a high school football team in Texas. Before Kyle Chandler won our hearts over as Eric Taylor, Billy Bob Thornton and Lucas Black won our hearts over in the movie. I remember seeing the movie in 2005 shortly after it came out when I was snowboarding with friends at Sunday River. The thing that attracted to me to the film, and then the TV show was the concept of what comes next. This notion is expressed beautifully in the original Friday Night Lights, a novel by H.G Bissinger which dives into the characters, history of the town, and the pressure that comes along with sports.

The quote above had me intrigued. Athletes produce an amount of greatness that is seen on TV, and read about in newspapers everyday. Some overcome challenges to achieve their dreams, while others face challenges that destroy their dreams. This particular quote comes from H.G Bissinger, who managed to write one of the best sports novels according to Sports Illustrated.

Sports and athletes work together tirelessly to produce the same outcome, where hope comes alive on television, and one sees the greatness in another; even if it’s only for 4 quarters. It’s those 4 quarters that make us realize why sports are important — to the viewer, and the player. To the viewer, as previously stated, they get to see the greatness, and feel the hope of their home team potentially winning. To the player, well, they experience the greatness, as well as the pride, and the multitude that becomes a sense of urgency to win, and to be the best. When all the applause and praise goes away however, I wonder what happens next to these players? Do they just disappear without a trace, or do the lessons they learn on the field follow them, and help them become a better person?

Well, yes it would be easy to say the latter, that by playing sports, one becomes a better version of themselves, works hard, understands the pride and accomplishment of winning, but also learns the gracefulness of losing.

We all know how bitter one can get if they disappear without a trace..

Lock-Sport-Krock

This post is inspired by:

” There’s something good coming, for you and me.

There’s something good coming, there has to be “ .

Setting the scene: staring at a blank WordPress canvas, trying to make it the best possible for “all my readers”, all 5 of you, I mean. A few things going through my head today, and I’ve come to talk to you about it. You might have once heard (or in this case, seen) me mention a writing prompt book I purchased: 300 writing prompts. I got this book a while back in hopes of writing more, and in hopes that it will bring me some inspiration for this blog. Sadly, it sat on my shelf for a while, and then I moved it around, and then put it in a drawer. It wasn’t until last week when I pulled it out again after I read something from my photography class. Long story short; I read that in order to fall in love with one form of art,  you must appreciate all forms of artThis really stuck out to me, and made a lot of sense. Therefore, I pulled the book out, and started reading before writing.

The prompts range from focusing on memories, to making wishes for the future, and everything in between. Two prompts stuck out to me that I thought I’d share:

1.) Describe your life now in terms of a traffic sign.

2.) What is the worst emotion a human being can feel?

As I thought about both of these prompts, and my answers for them, I picked another book I own, a book my Dad got me at end of 2014 called Fight On. The book is fantastic, and simplistic.

If you know my writing, you might have seen that I’m a big believer in someone’s words making a significant difference; hence why I love to read, write this blog, keep a journal, and listen to music at every second I can get. It gives me perspective on all things and everything. 

This book has outdone itself. It is plated with a phrase on each page, and a periodic photograph.

Fight On-book-4848-07.jpg

A wonderful read, and a great find. Sometimes people need that.

A quiet reminder to keep fighting on.

True Love

This post is inspired by:

“Start by loving the camera, and end by loving the art”

A few days ago I started taking a photography class online. I’ve taken a few photography classes before, and have obviously enjoyed them. There are some things in life you’ll never forget: first time you rode a bike, first love, first kiss, first breakup, first time you drove alone, first date, etc. A memory that will always stick out to me is when I got my first camera, and of course, the person that gave it to me.

My first camera was a silver Polaroid camera that I received for Christmas, when I was probably around 8 or 9. Now that I’m thinking about it however, that doesn’t seem that long ago. Do you ever think about something in regards to how fast time goes, and when you really really think about you, you realize that it’s not that long ago? That’s the feeling I’m experiencing right now. Yes, between then and now, a lot has happened, as that happens with time, but it’s a feeling I’ll never forget. Shortly after I received my Polaroid, I bought my first camera. Another memory I won’t forget. My dad and I were on our way to one of my basketball practices, and I saved enough money (probably somewhere around $50) to buy my first digital camera. A pink Polaroid digital camera. I’ve never been happier. I was so excited and thrilled to show my dad the perks of having my very own camera, and you could tell he understood how important that was to me.

Fast forward through a bitter parental divorce, tough years of middle school, sibling fights, a suspended license, a high school graduation, one family death, 8 years of basketball, and three years of college to today. 15 years later.

IMG_4867

People say that you never forget your first love. You never forget the happy times, and the way they made you feel when you were together. When you’re apart, you constantly feel like you should be together, and maybe try again. This is my relationship with photography. Ever since I picked up a camera for the first time 15 years ago, I’ve been in love. But as most relationships go, they end, if even for a little bit. The year was irrelevant, but the feeling clearly was not. I stopped picking up my camera, and let dust cover it. I put it back in my camera bag, and let it sit in my closet; and every once and a while, I would think of picking it up again, and attempt to find that feeling again. The feeling of doing something strictly for me, for my own pleasure and passion of the art.

It’s funny, as I have been going back and forth with the notion of returning to photography for years. Sharing my photos, rehashing my first love. Literally thinking, if it’s meant to be, it’ll work.

So, with this post, here is to destiny, true love, and never giving up on your first love.

Wednesday’s are the new Friday’s

This quote is inspired by:

“Always do your best. Don’t stop just because someone doesn’t give you credit.”

Tonight I had a drink with a friend from work — someone who I’ve become very close with, almost like a brother to me, and of course, like any other night, I drove him home. I don’t know if it was because of the drinks in me, or the very reality of our conversation, but the conversation dove deeper than I’d ever expected. Yes, to the blank eye, we were talking about clouds, but to him and I, we were talking about life. And how sometimes in life, it is depicted as one thing, but it means a completely different thing once you take a closer look. I was able to take that closer look tonight. More on this later, I promise.

That in itself should be praised upon, and if you care a little bit, it’s 1:34 as I’m posting this.